something is wrong.

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worst blog ever fuck you all

my eye hurts

i've been chopping wood like all day. P U!

i also perfected my penne marinara with basil and feta recipe. jigga jay-z what?!

focus group.

i recieved a voicemail today. it was some older woman who's voice i didn't recognize. i wasn't paying much attention, but i heard the words "you will be paid" in there, followed shortly thereafter by a telephone number.

so of course i called it.

as fate would have it, the older woman worked for a survey company. i have no idea how they knew my name or telephone number, but they wanted me to join a focus group, and they were going to pay me for it. the aforementioned focus group will have one objective: taste-testing pizza.

yes, your eyes are not decieving you, they are going to pay me to eat pizza.

someone needs to teach them how the world works.

funniest part of 2005?

many things happened, but none were funnier than sitting in Cheddar's, screaming things like "lost to a dead guy" and "take away my civil liberties" with friends.

oh, good ol' johnny "lady justice cannot have breasts" ashcroft was there too, natch.

no way, yahweh!

want. need.

want! need!

want? need?

jesus?

no.

one american christmas two thousand five

scores stomping overhead, singing the praises of nascar,
and jerry lee lewis,
shouting for attention,
loudly laughing.

i am underneath, wearing what i wore yesterday,
my hair in all directions,
wanting no attention,
silently crying.

what a mess.

old man, also bicyclist invasion

there is an old man here. he is the oldest. he has a great old man suit on. he is sleeping on the couch. he looks dead. we are in public. everyone stares as they walk by. i am sad.

a pack of bicyclists just came in. they are the bicyclistest. they have terrible bicyclist gear on. they are not sleeping. if i look like that ever in the future, i hope i also look dead as well. we are in public. everyone stares as they walk by. i am sad.

Blogger, the Christmas gift one gives oneself

I got bored of my myspace blog. This one looks nicer. And with such a pretentious title, one could expect some ramblings about Nietzsche or Zoroastrianism. Yay!

One could also be wrong.